July 16, 2008

Things to remember

I almost always think things are going to be more difficult than they really are. Picking up the girls this afternoon raised my spirits like a bounce from hard rock to a trampoline. Silvia was dozing when I got to her classroom, and she blinked her eyes open and started smiling with her tongue sticking out even before she was fully awake. "Mama! Hi-llo Mama!", and then big big hugs. After I picked her up, she waved bye to her teacher and started patting my arm comfortingly with more, "Mama, hi!".

Anna came dashing across the room, hitting me at knee level and nearly knocking me over with her exuberance. As we walked to the car, she quizzed me for what we were going to do, what to do, what, Mama? What are we going to do? As always, slowed her down with our shared mantra, "One thing at a time, sweetie. Let's get to the car first."

I realized, at that moment, that my pulse had slowed and with it, my mist of constant tears. One thing at a time, indeed. Perspective is an amazing thing. It is so sweetly humbling when my little carefree children adjust mine with no effort at all. As we settled into our afternoon, I switched from lacking and low to grateful and guided. What would we do? Walks, parks, library, playdates, sprinklers, baking, stories, coloring... there were so many things. Good things.

I need to remember that.

P.S. By the way, I finally figured out how to get the comments link to show up for my posts. I used my amazing powers of technical savvy-tude. That's why it took me months. Leave a note if you like.


Lea said...

That is too cute! I can't wait until Asher can talk and say, "Hello, Mommy." So adorable!

frog said...

I couldn't agree more... Perspective is an amazing thing indeed. :)

Shannon's Venting Session said...

Hello Meg, I used to blog all the time and quit, I resently started again as a means of venting and stumbled upon yours. I enjoyed reading yours because I dealt with a very similar situation after having my twins. I was trying to get motivated to start blogging again so I was reading a bunch of blogs and ran across yours. Blogging to me was a way of expressing my feelings and writing about them...helped me. It is a way of venting out into the world as a form of communication and this comforted me. Although I am not nearly as wonderful a writer as you. I saw your picture on day while reading and thought you looked very familiar. I couldn't get it out of my head... why you looked familiar!!! Then, I looked at some old electronic pictures I have on my lap top. You are Kurts wife!! He sent pictures out to friends and family when you had your 2nd daughter. I am an old friend of his! What a small world. I really hope that this doesn't scare you off from blogging but felt obligated to tell you. I really enjoy your blogs and have gone through a very similar situation as I mentioned above when my...now 13 year old twins were first born. I experienced extreme depression after having them and also had a 4 year old at the time. Please know that I completely understand your situation as I have been there. My email is savitchs@saic.com if you would rather I not read them and I will honor your request out of respect for you and Kurt. Let me know. ---Shannon Savitch